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Late Night Drive With Mr.POYO


Menurut kamus Bahasa Kay-El, Poyo bererti Proud Of Your Own. Seseorang yang poyo adalah 

"Seseorang yang berwatakan luar dari norma orang biasa seperti merasakan diri-sendiri bagus, suka temberang dan bercakap luar dari kenyataan"

Cik Panda tipu. Sebenarnya Cik Panda belum insaf sepenuhnya. Masih lagi gigih menswipe Tinder cuma sejak akhir-akhir ni kurang sikit. 

So mamat ni, H, dah lama match dgn Cik Panda tapi tak pernah jumpa. Chat pun jarang. Tiba-tiba sejak dua menjak ni rajin pulak dia tegur. Cik Panda layankan je la uols. Bak kata orang rezeki jangan ditolak kan?

Dia ajak keluar beberapa kali tapi iols kan selalu busy. Ye la, kalau nak date dengan Cik Panda kena booking 3 days in advance. So dia selalu kena reject.

Part of the reason why I'm a bit reluctant was even from text messaging, he has that poyo vibe. If you know what I mean. 

At one time, he was talking (bragging) about the difference between Japanese, Korean and Chinese girls. How Koreans are more elegant and Chinese girls like to dress skimpily. 

And he also talked about hookups and I told him I'm not looking for hookups, just a friend I can do crazy, fun things with like a late-night drive somewhere or getting chicken nuggets at 3am. 

So hence the title of this post.

I said yes maybe because I was bored. Plus I'm not working the next day. So we agreed for a late-night drive to Genting Highlands. 

He picked me up from my place after I got back from the gym. I have not eaten so we went to mamak where I eat (I paid, he just drink) and listened to him blabber/brag about himself. 

Belajar kat US so ada slang mat salleh US. That annoying drawl. Plus he uses a lot of swear words when he talked. 

Like shit, fucking shit, holy fucking shit, take this piece of shit.

Konon mat salleh ni semua kagum and tak percaya dia Malaysian sebab his English was so good. And how he impressed his employers/company with his English. 

How he traveled the world and worked overseas. He can't stop talking about how effing amazing Singapore is and how lame Malaysia is. 

I lost concentration after 5 minutes of listening to him and begin to regret my decision to go out with him.

Of course, he did ask about me but when I talk, he has that far away look on his face as if he's not listening but thinking of what to brag about next. After that, I lose interest in talking about myself. 

Cepat je jari jemari ini text para bodyguard tersayang. 

"Yang, u balik je. Jangan keluar dengan dia. cakap ada hal."

But I was too nice and agreed to go for that late-night drive.  

In that 1 hour journey, he talked and talked and talked the whole time from Serdang to Genting Highlands. 

Because I don't want to talk about myself, I just said "ya? Really? Oh wow. That's great. Ye ke?" to encourage him to talk. 

He is doing real estate at the moment so he brags about how he can't believe at 28, he owned a house in Bukit Bintang and Cyberjaya. Blabber about the real estate world, investments, money, incomes, earnings.

All I hear was bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. 

We walked around a bit in Genting then he had something to eat in Mcd. I was feeling bloated and full of bullshit so I just watched him eat.

When we got to the car, we sat in the car, in quiet without the engine on for a few minutes when suddenly he said

"Wanna make out?"

WADAFAK. 

Umur ja 28. Sembang kencang, rumah dua bijik, study US, kerja oversea tapi perangai macam budak-budak! Stress la mak hayam macam ni. If I'm a guy, I probably won't have erection for the rest of my life. 

So much so for a romantic walk on the cool, misty ground of Genting Highlands. What a turn-off!

On the way down, we were talking about Tinder and stuff. Oops correction. He was talking and I listened.

He was bragging about girls he slept with. Like "If I'm not good in bed, why do u think they look for me again? Of course, some of them wanted to be my gf after we slept together but why would I want to be a bf to a girl who sleeps with a guy on the first date?" 

You see how obnoxious and a jerk he is?

Why is it okay for a guy to sleep with a girl on a first date and people look at it as an accomplishment but when a girl does the same, she is a slut?

To me, he is like this nerdy, loser, lame kid who brags to cover his inadequacy. 

Like he has this intense desire to show people that he is successful, rich and what not. Which I think he used to cover his boring personality, absent sense of humour and warmth.

And he wasn't even a good kisser. Cehhh. 

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