Sitting in Chilla Cup and trying to think of something to blog about. Inspiration struck me and was about to write something when this hunky hot gorgeous personal trainer from the fitness studio i went to came, said "Hi", sat next to my table and started to chat with me. I suddenly can't think straight and idea pun entah pergi mana sudah.
20 minutes later he left. Pheeewwww.....The power of someone gorgeous.
Anyway, back to our topic. Most of us spent a lot of our time looking for love. Wondering if we ever will find THE ONE. Most of us are guilty of determining our self-worth based on our relationship status. I'm not worth a thing because no one wants me. Saya loser sebab saya tidak laku etc. There is so much emphasize on being in a relationship. It's like the be all and end all of life.
"Why are you still alone? You are too choosy, high taste and demanding."
"Memilih sangat. Bila la mau kahwin. Nanti sudah kerepot tidak laku, tiada orang mau baru tau. Jadi andartu."
I get that all the time. In my most humble opinion, jadi andartu lebih baik dari main tangkap muat dan makan hati seumur hidup. I don't need to depend on any guy/man for emotional or financial support.
"Nanti sudah tua, tak ada orang jaga." How sure are you that you will be alive until you are old? We are not promised tomorrow you know. I choose to live in the present.
Yes there are a few who tried and still trying to approach but sometimes i feel they are just looking for someone to fill in a position. To fulfill their idea of a perfect girlfriend. They only wanted to own me. They are not interested in the person that i really am. They don't care about my hopes and dreams, my fears and insecurities. They don't want to know the mundane details of my life. They don't really know me. All they talked about is themselves. How many really like me for the person that i am? And when i failed to fill in their idea of a perfect girlfriend, what will happen? They are in love with the idea of love, of relationship and not with the person.
I want someone who really cared, really interested in the person that i am, with all my weaknesses and flaws, someone who i can really be myself with, who's interested in all the mundane details of my life, who inspired me to be a better person, who made me smile and laugh so much my cheeks hurts and if wanting all that made me a choosy person, so be it.
There's nothing pitiful or lonely in choosing to be single. Very few understand this. You are happily married or in a relationship? Congratulations and good for you. But don't force your idea of happiness on those who choose not to follow your path. It's better to be single than to be in a relationship with someone who made you feel lonely. It's better to be alone than to be with the wrong person. Being single does not mean you are weak. It means you are strong enough to wait for what you deserve.
"Being single used to mean that nobody wanted you. Now it means you're pretty sexy and you're taking your time deciding how you want your life to be and who you want to spend it with."
- Sex and the City
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