"Babe I don't how to put into words la my frustrations. I'm so upset but I just don't know why, i don't know how to express it." said my friend while we were at the gym waiting for our class to start.
She does look troubled. Like she's holding something in.
"Why? what is it about? Work ah?" myself and another friend immediately assume work.
She's a data engineer with an international company. With such highly demanding job, it could be work related right?
Initially, she was a bit reluctant to reveal what is making her so upset and we did not push further.
After jumping and dancing and all that endorphin surge, she finally tells us that it's relationship trouble.
"I'm just so frustrated. I just feel so hopeless and defeated. You know right I separated from my ex-husband last year. And then ho, I started dating and was with this guy for 5 months then we broke off. And then I met this another guy, we went for a date and you know he bought me a Massimo Dutti dress, freaking expensive dress wehhh. And a perfume. All those things ah can easily be RM500."
Me and another friend was like "Wahh lauuuu expensive stuff for a first date man!"
"Ya la but you know, i don't want those things. The more i spend time talking to him, the lonelier I feel. I cannot explain this feeling. I went home and cry!"
Gulp.
And then she started to talk about how toxic the guy after her ex-husband was, how controlling and insecure he is. And how this Massimo Dutti guy was probably just a rebound.
"I don't know why i feel like this! I'm hopeless. I thought I've move on, i thought I'm okay but apparently I'm not. Am I never going to love again? Why do I feel like this?!"
I just don't know how to comfort her or make her feel better. Because I just don't know what to say.
I've been there before. I've been through all that shit and yet I just couldn't say anything right.
If anything, I don't think I'm qualified to give any relationship advice. Looking at my "rekod cemerlang" in that department, I'm sure nobody will listen to me.
"Emm I don't know. Don't push yourself. Maybe you should take a break from dating. or if you want to, just date for fun, not looking for anything serious and learn how to detach yourself emotionally from all these guys you are going out with."
Well, apparently she doesn't have a lot of experience in dating.
She married her boyfriend from Uni and they were together for 10+ years before separating late last year. And before that, she only had 1 boyfriend.
After being married for quite some time, it must be scary to go back into dating.
And it's a ruthless world out there.
Full of fuck boys, toxic people and guys who only wanted to take advantage of you.
Well, at least the ones I met are like that. Most of them just wanted to sleep with me. Blurrghhhhh.
Well anyway, the world is full of batshit crazy people.
Life is hard, don't be with someone who makes it harder. Or should it be, life is hard, find someone who will always be by your side through thick and thin?
Oh heck. Who cares. but the message is there, you get me?
But anyway, I highly admire and respect ladies out there who went through divorce with dignity, despite the pain and heartbreak, they emerged stronger.
I truly cannot imagine what they went through. Maybe if I were in that position, I would probably have mental breakdown and you guys have to visit me in Batu Tujuh.
Choooiiiiiiii. Touch wood. wakakaka
But anyway, here's to all the strong ladies out there, you guys are amazing!
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