Cik Panda Dibelakang Ice Box

After the first date HERE, we met a few days later at a mamak shop after I'm done with gym and he's done with futsal.

As usual, we were laughing and talking. Teasing and flirting is a must when suddenly he said

"You know, you are laughing and joking but deep down I can feel that you are actually sad. Like you are hiding something."

"What makes you say that?"

"I don't know. It's just that I can feel this vibe from you. I can see it in your eyes that you are sad. You can tell me you know."

Speechless sekejap Cik Panda. I don't know what to say because I don't actually know what makes me sad. It's combination of a lot of things and happenings for the past few months or even years.

Then he asked me "What actually do you want?"

How do I tell him that I'm scared that he will turn out to be like most of the guys I've met, a JERK? You think you found someone you connected with then suddenly they go MIA.

I like being friends with him, working out together and I enjoy the companionship. How do I tell him I'm scared of losing a friend like him? As much as I like my freedom, it's nice to have a companion once in a while.

Or how do I tell him that I'm sad because although there could be a million guys chasing after me but I only want one person and that person is ignoring me?

So I told him this

"I want a partner in crime. You know, someone I can talk to, laugh with, do things with, like a best friend but with that physical attraction. Not boyfriend or that kind of stuff."

"So you want a friend with benefit?"

Noooo. FWB sounds degrading. Actually I'm kinda confused myself. I want all the perks of having a boyfriend but I dread the commitment part, of heartache, stress, anxiety and jealousy.

He gave me a hug and apologized, seeing I was quite upset.

"Why do you apologize? It's not your fault."

"I feel that I need to. And I'm sorry if what I said or did made you sad or made you think I'm like the rest."

He really scares me you know. Because he can see right through the facade that I put up.

We were at the counter paying for our food, and I was ready to pay for mine when he said

"Can I pay it for you?"

Awww. See what I mean? Susahlah Cik Panda macam ni.

And then when I was at the gym locker room, these two girls were talking. One of them is quite young, early twenties and the other probably late twenties. On few occasions, I've often heard this young girl gave another lady advice on boyfriends and I was like

"OMG. you are so young and you are advicing an older person. What do you know about man by the way. Duhhhh."

So they were chit chatting and I could only hear snippets of their conversation

"bla bla..It's a good excuse for shopping. But my boyfriend don't understand."

"ya! I told my boyfriend the other day. bla bla bla.."

"Same! My boyfriend said this and that. bla bla bla bla...."

Cik Panda perlahan-lahan bergerak ke belakang, tutup lampu dan duduk di sudut locker room, dalam gelap sambil mengenang nasib diri....

Comments

Others Also Read This!

Porn Puaka Di Gym

Tajuk mengundang kontroversi Sis ni bukan apa rajin pergi gym, selain nak bersenam, iols juga suka mencuci mata. Bukan setakat mencuci mata dengan jantan helok (I'm still hoping sebab gym iols pegi tu SENDUU), sis juga suka melihat gegadis yang fefeeling gedik dengan bermacam fesyen di gym tu. Biasanya gegadis newbie ni macam cendawan. Muncul sekejap di kala azam baru masih utuh yakni di awal tahun atau selepas perayaan di mana memasing nak kurus. Tunggulah 2 bulan kemudian langsung tak nampak batang hidung ataupun buttcheeks. Eh? Sebenarnya salah satu benda Cik Panda nak cerita pasal butt cheeks. Butt cheeks are absolutely NO NO except at the pool or beach when you are in your swimsuit. Cik Panda tak jealous la uols sebab Cik Panda tak hingin pun nak ada bontot yang jelly welly tu. ZAssssss So hari tu ada sorang minah ni baru 1st time iols nampak kat gym, tengah workout dengan bopren dia la gitu. Pakai sports bra je dengan really short shorts yang menampakkan ...

Resipi Lemon Butter Cake Gebu, Mudah Dan Dijamin Sedap

Resipi Lemon Butter Cake Gebu, Mudah Dan Dijamin Sedap I love cakes but I love baking more than I love eating them. So sapa jadi mangsa habiskan kek-kek yang iols buatkan? Colleagues dan kawan-kawan iols lah yang untung. *Misi menggemukkan rakan sekerja* Lemon butter cake ni iols pernah buat seketika dahulu dan digemari oleh kawan iols, Ari Fatonah Diva. Tiba-tiba hari tu, iols dikunjungi oleh seruan angin surirumahtangga dan teringin nak buat lemon butter cake ni. Resipi ni iols ambik dari blog Phong Hong Bakes and Cooks . I love her blog because she is a die-hard foodie and hilarious too. By the way, resipi ni CPPS approved sebab kek ni ringan dan gebu. It's on the lighter, not-so-dense side with a nice, not too overpowering aroma and taste of lemon. Super sedap dan digemari ramai! Bahan-bahannya senang didapati, cuma teknik whisking egg whites and fold in the batter tu uols kena mantap sikit la. Hehe. Lols. Just showing how air...

5 Popular Meal Replacement Shakes In Malaysia

5 Popular Meal Replacement Shakes In Malaysia Image: Louis Hansel/ Unsplash Are you trying to lose weight but find it difficult to control your daily calorie intake? Or you are someone who is always on the go, regularly skipped meals, and find it really difficult to find healthy, well-balanced meals because of your extremely busy and demanding life? Meal replacement shakes could be the answer that you are looking for. What Is Meal Replacement Shakes? Generally, meal replacement shakes have a calorie count of around 200–400 calories and a decent amount of protein, fiber, and essential vitamins and minerals. It is essentially meal-on-the-go. Meal Replacement Shakes vs Protein Shakes. Are They The Same? They are not the same and are designed for different goals. Meal replacement shakes is designed to replace your meal so it must contain the essential nutrients (carbs, protein, fat, fibre, vitamin and minerals) A protein shake is just intended to deliver protein...

5 Produk Kurus Di Watsons: Jom Kita Review Bahan- Bahan Yang Terkandung Dalam Produk

5 Produk Kurus Di Watsons: Jom Kita Review Bahan- Bahan Yang Terkandung Dalam Produk Adakah anda antara orang yang pernah beli produk kurus sebab terpengaruh dengan iklan atau testimoni kawan-kawan? Beli tapi kenapa ya tak kurus-kurus? Okay takpa sis, kita try pulak produk lain. Produk X ni orang cakap bagus, maka korang pun terpengaruh lepas tu beli lepas tu tak nampak result. Frustrating kan? Badan tak kurus pun, yang kurus tu dompet uols je. Produk kurus memang sentiasa laku sepanjang zaman. Kat mana-mana pun ada jual, banyak sangat kat pasaran. Tapi macam mana kita nak tau yang mana okay, yang mana tak okay dan bazir duit je nak beli? Ha, kenalah jadi pengguna yang bijak sisturs & brother sekalian. Ambik tahu apa bahan-bahan yang terkandung dalm produk tu, fahami macam mana produk ni membantu untuk menurunkan badan. Baca: Kenali Bahan Lazim Yang Terkandung Dalam Produk Kurus Atau Fat Burner Barulah kita tidak senang terpengaruh dengan iklan at...

Common Malaysian Favourite Food And Their Calorie Content

Common Malaysian Favourite Food And Their Calorie Content Oh, Malaysia is definitely a food heaven. We have a looonnnnnggggg list of yummy food. My favourite would be nasi lemak ayam goreng. Sinful, i know but definitely the best. Others on the list is Penang Char Kueh Teow with lots of clams, Thosai masala, roti canai roti telur...etc. But do you know what is the calorie content of these foods? Some food have calories that exceeds your daily calorie intake with just one serving! How Many Calories Should You Consume Per Day? In general*: Adult male: 2440 kcal/day Adult female: 2000kcal/day * depending on your activity level. Or your weight (kg) x 30. i.e 50 x30= 1500kcal/day. Let's See How Many Calories These Favourite Malaysian Foods Contains: 1 Karipap = 128 kcal (almost equivalent to 2 hard boiled eggs!) Sarawak Kolo Mee = 467 kcal Mee goreng mamak = 660 kcal Char Kueh Teow = 629 kcal Teh tarik = 83 kcal Mee...

Jelly Belli

Search This Blog